Ways of finding serenity in this moment.

Hon Sha Zen Sho Nen,
representing Namaste, as used in Reiki. 

Ways of finding serenity in this moment.

I often wake to feeling great and do bit of yoga. Normally thereafter I will have a quick chat with a friend online, and then become apprehensive with feelings of, 'am I wasting time'.  Time in itself is actually so irrelevant, if we consider that the only time is right now, in this moment, as it is this moment that really counts, merely because we are immortal, with Eternal Life.  We face death daily, yet are eternal spirits.

Reflection or Postponement?

In this actual moment of awareness, I am here, I am alive, and created.  In addition, there is only one Creator, albeit He or She, by name of
God/Goddess/Buddha/Allah or any of the other names by which people have been introduced to their Maker.  I relate this to my own circumstances, certain friends know me by my birth name, Sancheo. However, my Xhosa and Zulu friends refer to me as Nomalanga, Langa meaning Sun, as Nomalanga refers to the feminine form of the sun, and they would not know Sancheo at all.  A rose by any other name, is a rose no less.

I have found my connection to my reality of 'now' and thus I am a human 'being', not being futuristic, nor a 'being' trapped in the past.  I acknowledge who I am here and now, by whatever name one might choose to call me.  The importance however is that I am hearing my call. Being in my 'now zone' I often interpret as a crossroads in life, my now.  Only with true constant reflection, am I able to find my true bearings.  There are so many constant choices to make.  In addition, knowledge is power, but knowledge without control is not that much.  How do I control what I am doing and thereby cause, if not by reflecting what I see moment to moment, day to day, and instance to instance? 

What is it that I am postponing?  

Is it possible that I am postponing what I am meant to be doing because of a fear, one that I am choosing not to recognize?  In order to surpass any addiction, or achieve a day-to-day task, or whatever it is I am choosing to postpone, by self-reflecting, I can identify my fear, which then enables me to launch and find lift from where ever I am now.

Why do I need to overcome silly fears that I do not even recognize?  

Fear feeds my ego, which in turn justifies my many postponements.  "I cannot do this now, as that may happen.  I will help you in two minutes because I am just finishing my cigarette, I can't listen to you now because I must first yada yada yada".  The list of my postponements per day is endless.  The thing is that this happens at all levels of my illusions pertaining to my reality, including my writing.  I find myself overwhelmed at the thought of someone else reading my thoughts, and instantly find something else 'more important' to do. 

My reading today is Psalm 111:10, "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom".  For years, it has baffled me as to why need we 'Fear the Lord'.  Well, our Creator creates all, including our choices.  What we fear is what brings upon our own strife and suffering, our own personal 'hell', created by our own 'devil' or 'ego'.  When the fear overcomes us, we are pretty much 'possessed' by that source, our own manifested addiction.  In addition, as the very true saying goes, 'what I resist persists'. 

In tarot, I find the reading of the IV Swords much of an illuminator as to this reality.  It represents slicing through the cloudiness of the mind, and sacrificing ego.  A knight lies upon a coffin alongside which he has laid down his sword, and hands are held together above his chest representing prayer and meditation.  The Knight has three sword suspended above him, one above his head to represent wisdom, one at his heart to represent love and, another above his solar plexus to representing power.  The Knight has laid himself to rest in a chamber, which is receiving its light through a stained glass window, thus reflecting light through the image of a resurrected Christ, granting blessings to a disciple.  In the same way, this card depicts to one a time to lay down your strife and accept the Sword of God within your heart, mind, and deeds, thereby 'sacrificing ego', hence death.  

Reading now from Ephesians 6:17, 18

'And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God' praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints –'

Inner reflection of the inner voice.

Is it not true, that right now at this very moment of time and place, I have all I need to overcome my fear?  What will happen if I let go of my fear now?  As I find myself thinking of 'letting go' I find a thousand voices screaming in my head, filling my mind with reasons why to 'hang on'.  Therefore, it is pertinent to decide to whom it is I am listening.  The appropriate tarot card is this instance is thus, II The High Priestess.  By allowing myself to recognize the High Priestess within me.  

I have found that the voices that scream at me represent  the ego,  and forgive myself for heeding them any attention, as I do forgive them for screaming 'as they know not what they are doing', and thereby learn from whatever ego it was that brought me here.  A voice that speaks calmly with understanding and patience is the voice I know is within my own self and those surrounding me, creating a sense of Namaste, the 'Creator within me recognizing the Creator within you', as seen in the symbol which I have illustrated above.